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The Royal College of Psychiatrists Improving the lives of people with mental illness

 

Depression and Men: key factsmen and depression

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What is depression?

We all have times when we feel depressed. sometimes depression goes on for a long time and become severe. You may be unable to lift yourself out of it. This is what doctors call 'depressive illness'.

 

Is depression different for men?

In general men are more competitive than women. We don’t like to admit that we need help. We are less likely to talk about our feelings with others. This may be why men don’t get the help they need. Some symptoms of depression are more common in men. These include irritability, anger, loss of control, greater risk-taking and aggression. Men are also more likely to take their own lives.

 

How do men deal with depression?

We are more likely to use drugs and alcohol than asking for help.This usually makes things worse. Our work suffers and alcohol can lead us to behave irresponsibly or dangerously. We may also focus more on our work than our relationships or home life.This can cause conflicts with partners. All of these things make depression more likely.

 

What factors are linked to depression in men?

 

  • Relationships: trouble in a marriage or long-term relationship is the most common problem associated with depression. Men tend not to cope with disagreements as well as women. Arguments can make men feel uncomfortable so they try to avoid  disagreements and difficult discussions. For example, their partner will want to talk about a problem, but the man  will try to avoid it. The partner then feels ignored and tries to talk about it more, which makes the man feel he is being nagged. So, he withdraws further, which makes his partner feel even more ignored and so on. This can destroy a relationship.
  • Sex: when men are depressed, they may go off sex completely. A few depressed men report an increase in sex drive and intercourse, possibly as a way of trying to feel better. Some antidepressant drugs reduce sex-drive in men and women. However, the good news is that, as the depression improves, so will sexual desire.
  • Impotence: difficulty in getting an erection can cause depression.
  • Unemployment and retirement: leaving work, for any reason, can be stressful. One in seven men who become unemployed will get depressed within six months. And then, depression can make it harder to get another job.
  • Suicide: men are three times more likely than women to kill themselves. You are more likely to have these feelings if you are on your won or a heavy drinker.

Getting help

Helping yourself

  • If you’ve had a major upset in your life, try to tell someone how you feel about it.
  • Keep active. This will help to keep you fit and you will sleep better.
  • Eat a balanced diet, with lots of fruit and vegetables.
  • Avoid alcohol and drugs. They will make you more depressed in the long run.
  • Try relaxation methods. For example yoga, massage or aromatherapy.
  • Do something you enjoy at least once a week.
  • If you are a perfectionist, you may be driving yourself too hard. Try setting yourself more realistic targets.
  • Read about depression. Books and websites can give you ideas on how to cope.

Think about depression differently

It can help to see depression as a result of chemical changes in the brain and/or as the cost of living in stressful times. It can affect the strongest person, but it can be treated. Both talking and medication can be important ways to help you get better.

 

Professional help

The place to start is your GP who can go over your treatment options, and discuss any worries you have about confidentiality. You may be concerned that being depressed could damage your chances in work. Remember, in the UK, it is illegal for an employer to fire you - or not hire you - just because you have depression.

 

Depression may be due to physical illness, so you should get a physical check-up from your GP.

 

This is an abridged version of our main leaflet on 'Depression in Men'.

 

Produced by the Royal College of Psychiatrists' Public Education Editorial Board, chaired by Dr Phil Timms.

 

This leaflet is made available through the generosity of the Charitable Monies Allocation Committee of the mental health charity St Andrew's, Northampton

St Andrews Healthcare

 

 

 

 

 

© November 2012. Due for review: November 2014. The Royal College of Psychiatrists. You can link to, download, print, photocopy and distribute this leaflet free of charge. But you must not change it or repost it on a website.

 

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Please note that we are unable to offer advice on individual cases. Please see our FAQ for advice on getting help.

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